Eight Strategies for Culture Shock

You do not have to live in a Zambian mud hut or find yourself to be the only gringa in a crowd full of thousands of Ticos to experience culture shock, or a sense of surprise that you have found yourself in a certain corner of the world (even if this corner of the world happens to be at home). We all know that culture is everywhere and regardless of whether one has traveled abroad they have experienced a world view different from their own. Culture weaves its way into age groups, work environments, family dynamics, recreational activities, the online world, etc. etc. In the last ten days, I've been a foreigner in Costa Rica, then a foreigner among foreigners because I speak Spanish and have lived with the locals. I've also made interesting observations on the lifestyle of backpacker travelers, surfers and the beach community of Santa Teresa, CR. I realize that this trip of mine to Costa Rica is merely that, a vacation, and not a living experience. Therefore it should be a breeze for me to pretend I'm a Tica or a beach bum for a mere two weeks. For the most part, it does seem that my ability to adjust to another culture has come as easily as remembering how to ride a bike. However, there have been a few moments of struggle which have led me to create the following list of strategies for a fun survival.

The cliff notes version for friends who have told me I can be too verbose:

1. Be grateful for everything
2. Laugh

3. Chew, smile, and swallow
4. Dance, even if you think you don't know how to
5. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the view

6. Take care of yourself

7. Drink a little bit (with caution)

8. If all else fails, ask for forgiveness, forgive yourself and move on.

The rambling version (mostly for myself):

1. Be grateful for everything

This trip has left me with a predominant feeling of gratitude. Gratitude for various stories listed in this blog, gratitude that I have gotten to experience so much of the world over the last ten years, and mostly for the relationships I have made doing so. My Costa Rican family was the first family of foreigners who taught me lessons on generosity. They fed me, sheltered me, loved me and taught me Spanish ten years ago and have repeated such gifts in the same manner this time around. I am so thankful they have trusted me enough to let me peer into and become a part of their lives for a little while. Moments that make cultural immersion worthwhile include the following:

Daniela and I curling up with her mother Irma in her bed as we watched a Peruvian cooking show after stuffing ourselves with rice, beans and fish. We only payed slight attention to it as we distracted ourselves with laughing (bring in strategy #2 below) about me being the "hija perdida¨ and discussing how different life in Colorado would be for them, how they would die in the snow and cold. They say that one day they will visit and I can only hope this is true as I would love to pay back a small amount of all gifts they have shared with me.

Being grateful of course also includes constant reminders about appreciating everything that is wonderful about home, something I hope to write more about in a future entry.

2. Laugh

Something else to be grateful for? The capacity to laugh with others and at myself.

During one of the nights we were staying in San Carlos, Daniela and I were changing into pijamas when she suddenly shrieked upon the discovery of a cockroach on her shirt. Shooing it away near my feet, I had an immediate reaction of fright and did a creepy crawly sort of dance. Once again we could not stop laughing. Who would have ever thought a cockroach could have such an effect?

3. Chew, smile, and swallow

Another time I have been forced to laugh at myself has been me and the challenge of eating meat down here. Prior to this trip I convinced myself I was going to stick as much as possible to my oh-so-prenentious pescatarian diet (and to be a little bit more easy going said that an occasional piece of chicken could be fit in). My how that has flown out the window, starting with me consuming a delicious pineapple cream cheese dip at a Costa Rican uncle's birthday party last Saturday. I pinky swear that I did not notice the flakes of pink as I commented to Daniela how rico the dish was. All she did was laugh and ask in a sarcastic, carniverous way whether I knew I was eating pork. With an abashed no, I said it did not matter because I was in Costa Rica and could do whatever I wanted, taking a bite of the steak on her plate. Daniela's response to this was that I only care about American animals and not the Costa Rican ones.

I thought that the meat eating of that night would be an isolated event but of course the next morning awoke to my host mother Irma serving me a Costa Rican breakfast plate complete with a heaping portion of ham and eggs casserole (note that it appeared impossible to pick the ham out of the eggs). I know that I could have politely reminded Irma that I ¨usually¨ try not to eat pork, however the pride and generosity with which she had served the plate led me to my decision to forfeit my desire to not eat meat. My strategy at this point was to chew, smile, be grateful (strategy #1) and swallow.

Since becoming a semi-vegetarian many have asked me whether I have noticed changes in the way I feel in my body. I had never been sure of the answer until now that I have been reintroduced to the consumption of pork and beef on this trip. I must have a stomach of steel as I have not felt physically ill per se (or at least have not yet) BUT I have become acutely aware of an undefined, difficult to explain, fog of heaviness and disgust in my stomach.

I will not say that I regret eating the pork but will declare that I plan on returning to my vegetarian lifestyle with a vengance upon my return Stateside. And will be grateful there that I have full choice over what foods I want to nourish my body with, as well as the access to markets where I can buy them.

4. Dance, even if you think you don't know how to

Just do it. Don't think about it too much. See other blog entries for details.

5. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the view

Give me an i-pod and a window seat on any sort of bus and I am a patient, content girl. It may sound strange to some but bus rides with good views are often my most memorable and favorite parts of traveling. I am sure this origniated with the drive between San Jose and San Carlos I grew accustomed to many years ago. It was so nice to experience the views on this journey again this time around. This 2.5-3 hour long ride of windy roads blanketed by an ephemeral mist of fog showcases so much beauty. Coffee plantations are chiseled into the faces of lush, green, rolling hills. On the edges, houses painted with bold colors and topped with corrugated roofs hang daringly close to the edges. You pass pastures of cows munching on grass in between small, lazy towns that hug themselves to the side of the road. People that live in them seem to always be enjoying the simplicity of life- whether it is the older woman lounging on her patio as she munches on a bag of plantain chips, the farmer with large sombrero and heavy black boots walking alongside the road, or the soccer team of boys sitting in a circle on a green plaza in front of one of the town's cathedrals.

On this drive I found myself thinking about a lot of different people in the world- my sister in Portland came to mind, my Mom in the suburbs of Denver, my best friend in New York City, my Zambian family back in Africa. It seemed a miracle to me that so many places and lives were all existing simultaneously.

6. Take care of yourself

One of my biggest challenges of traveling recently has been finding the appropriate time and space to take care of myself physically and mentally. I previously mentioned how little my Costa Rican life seems to have changed since coming here years ago. Something major that has, however, have been my discovery of how much of an impact yoga, meditation and eating healthy can have on my life. There were several days I went on this trip without incorporating any of these into my time and the absence of them did not go unnoticed in my body or mind. This brings me back to the aspect of gratitude and how traveling can make you realize the benefits of your life back home. I have much more control over what I eat back there, have a plethora of yoga teachers to learn from, as well as have a beautiful, quiet and adequate space to meditate in.

I do try to remind myself here though that even though I can not do a full hour of asana (the sanskrit term for yoga poses) or find a quiet space for fifteen minutes in which to meditate, this does not mean that I can not take a deep breath from time to time or do a forward fold in the privacy of a bathroom.

I am also grateful (strategy #1!) that I am currently writing this from Playa Santa Teresa. I am here taking a break from being Tica and playing catch-up on my spirituality, as well as having fun in the sun. Yoga classes to the sound of ocean waves abound here and I have plans for my first meditation on a beach. I also, of course, am planning on engaging in all of the other strategies discussed on this blog entry here (see below).

7. Drink a little bit (but with caution)

I have to admit that some moments here, drinking has been the best remedy. When I first arrived in Santa Teresa all by myself, I was terrified of being lonely for many days and that I wouldn't make friends. A little wine to the rescue to try to combat that shy side of me and I found myself having interesting chats with backpackers from Germany, Denmark, England and San Francisco.

Another situation in which drinking seemed to be the best resort was last Sunday when Daniela convinced me to accompany her to a party in a town called Palmares. This turned out to be a sort of carnival, music festival and drinking fest all mixed into one. Under the hot Costa Rican sun, I suddenly found myself packed into a crowd full of drunk, college-aged Ticos, dancing in a way that Daniela described as vulgar (means the same in English) to reaggeton (I have no idea how you spell this) music. In Costa Rica apparantly at concerts a large part of the party culture involves cooling off by dumping beer onto each other's heads as well as spraying it into the rest of the crowd. At first I was slightly annoyed by all of this and felt incredibly old which had me feeling sad for a spell. Costa Rican Imperial and Rock Ice with lime to the rescue! This way I was more able to effectively dance and laugh with Daniela and her cousin Mariela at all of the borrachos in the crowd.

8. If all else fails, ask for forgiveness, forgive yourself, and move on

Nine hours, a nasty shoulder-strap sunburn and a beer-an-hour later, I was no longer able to effectively implement the strategies above. I kept telling Daniela that I was too American and too old to be at Palmares, frustrated with the fact that her and a boy she is dating (post breakup) kept telling me we would be leaving in 30 minutes even when they had said that hours before. As day grew into night (nights have been surprisingly cold in San Jose) and the pork I had eaten fermented in my belly along with the beer, I was no longer a happy camper. How quickly I seemed to have forgotten the laid back lifestyle of Tico Time (not to mention its Zambian cousin). I feel embarrassed about this bout of mal humor and wish I could have maintained more of a free spirit. Fortunately, this brings me again back to strategy number one. I am so grateful that I have created a relationship with my Costa Rican sister where she can see the bad side of me but forgive me and love me anyway.

As I mentioned, I am in Santa Teresa Beach for today before heading up to Playa Conchal tomorrow to finish the trip out with my host family before I catch my flight back to Colorado on Monday. Once again, I will find myself in a cultural situation where all of the above tips will be quite necessary. :)